1. |
Radass
02:06
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I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS
STUPID MOTHERFUCKER
RUN FOR COVER
I'M SO SICK OF YOUR SHIT
YOUR TIME IS UP
I'VE GOT YOUR NUMBER
IT'S TIME TO PAY THE PIPER
I'M GONNA KICK YOU IN THE DICK
I'M RAD
AND I'M A BADASS
SO FUCKING RAD
I'M RADASS
I'M SO SORRY
PLEASE DON'T HURT ME
HERE TAKE MY MONEY
I'VE GOT A CRAMP IN MY LEG
YOU'D BETTER RUN 'CAUSE I'M RADASS
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2. |
RGB
00:38
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SHE USED TO HAUNT MY DREAMS
HYPNOTIZED BY AN RGB CONSOLE SCREEN
EVERYDAY MY FIXATION GREW
I WONDER IF SHE KNEW
THE SUM OF MY TEENAGE FEARS
WATCHING VIDEO ARCADES DISAPPEAR
JUST LIKE QUARTERS IN THE SLOT
ONE BY ONE UNTIL THEY WERE GONE
SHE WAS ONCE SO ACCESSIBLE
NOW SHE PLAYS HARD TO GET
I STILL SEE HER OUT NOW AND AGAIN
I HAVEN'T GIVEN UP ON HER YET
IMPOSSIBLE TO IGNORE
STILL TRYING FOR THE HIGH SCORE
SHE DOESN'T HAVE A CHEAT CODE NOW SHE'S AN EASY MARK
EVADING GHOSTS UNTIL THAT FINAL SCREEN GOES DARK
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3. |
Hey Mr. Hipster
01:25
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FUCK YOUR CAFE RACER
FUCK YOUR RESTORED PACER
FUCK YOUR VINTAGE AIRSTREAM AND YOUR FIXIE TOO
HEY MR. HIPSTER FUCK YOU
FUCK YOUR RETRO FASHION
FUCK YOUR LACK OF PASSION
FUCK YOUR LATEST STARTUP AND YOUR SMUG ATTITUDE
HEY MR. HIPSTER FUCK YOU
YOU RUINED SAN FRANCISCO, BROOKLYN, AND 78704
WITH ANACHRONISTIC MUSIC THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE CIVIL WAR
VAPING AT THE MOVIES MANBUN ON DISPLAY
YOU NEVER SHUT THE FUCK UP AND NEVER HAVE A THING TO SAY
YOU THINK ANYBODY REALLY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR HOPPY MICROBREW
HEY MR. HIPSTER FUCK YOU
FUCK YOUR VEGAN DIET
YOU KNOW I'LL NEVER TRY IT
QUARTER MILLION DOLLAR EDUCATION COULDN'T BUY YOU A CLUE
HEY MR. HIPSTER FUCK YOU
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4. |
Big Shot
03:00
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YOU USED TO BE A BIG SHOT MAN
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
YOU HAD A BRAND NEW MUSTANG
BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL
ONCE SO LOUD AND PROUD
NOW YOU BARELY SPEAK AT ALL
JUNIOR COLLEGE FOOTBALL STAR
PASSED OUT AT THE BAR
YOU USED TO BE A BIG SHOT
NOW YOU HAVE SEVEN KIDS
WITH FIVE DIFFERENT WOMEN
IN THREE DIFFERENT CITIES
YOUR LAVISH LIFESTYLE WAS A FRONT
AND YOU FIGURED IT OUT
YOU FEEL LIFE PUNCHED YOU IN THE GUT
AND ITS SOMEONE ELSE'S FAULT
ALL THE BIG DREAMS AND PLANS YOU HAD
HAVE ALL BEEN PUT ASIDE
'CAUSE CHILD SUPPORT IS A BITCH
AND THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH
DESPITE ALL THE SHIT YOU PULLED
I HOPE THAT YOU FOUND PEACE
AND AS EVERYBODY KNOWS
THINGS AREN'T WHAT THEY SEEM
AS EVERY BIG SHOT LEARNS
NOTHING LASTS TOO LONG
AND WHO CAN REALLY SAY
WHAT IS RIGHT AND WHAT IS WRONG?
FROM ONE BIG SHOT TO ANOTHER
JUST TRY TO BE A FATHER
NEVERMIND WORRYING ABOUT THE THINGS THAT YOU AIN'T GOT
JUST LEAVE THEM TO THE BIG SHOT
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5. |
Ban The Bun
02:03
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STUPID NERDS ARE EVERYWHERE
WHAT'S THAT TURD UP IN YOUR HAIR?
YOU WALK AROUND LIKE YOU'RE HOT SHIT
SERIOUSLY DUDES I JUST DON'T GET IT
MAN BUN, MAN BUN
BAN THE BUN MAN
MAN BAN THE BUN, MAN
MAN, BAN THE MAN BUN
YOU LOOK A LITTLE LIKE A CHICK
I BET YOU HAVE A TINY DICK
GREW OUT YOUR HAIR
AND SHAVED YOUR BEARD
I GUESS YOU'RE JUST KEEPING IT WEIRD
I'LL KNOCK YOU OUT AND CUT IT OFF
YOU'LL WAKE UP CRYING AND I'LL LAUGH
SORRY BUDDY LIFE IS TOUGH
TIME TO PART WAYS WITH THAT PUSSY PUFF
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6. |
Sk-8 '88
01:37
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TIC-TAC OLLIE ACID DROP
GRIND RAILSLIDE MANUAL BONELESS NO-COMPLY
KICKFLIP SHOVE-IT VARIAL NOLLIE POWERSLIDE
IN THE SUMMER OF '88
I REMEMBER JUST LIKE YESTERDAY
KIDS WERE SNIFFING GLUE STEALING BIKES FOR KICKS
I WAS TRYING TO LAND THE LATEST TRICKS
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7. |
Love Is Rad
03:01
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I'VE BEEN LET DOWN MORE TIMES THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW
SO YOU'LL HAVE TO FORGIVE ME IF I JUST WANT TO TAKE IT SLOW
HAVE I FINALLY FIGURED OUT THE SECRET TO SUCCESS IN LOVE?
OR JUST ANOTHER FALSE HOPE UNTIL THE EXCITEMENT WEARS OFF?
LOVE IS RAD WHEN ITS SHINY AND NEW
NO ONE ELSE MAKES ME FEEL LIKE YOU DO
FELT THIS BEFORE BUT IT FADED SO FAST
WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO MAKE THIS FEELING LAST?
EVERYTHING IS SO PERFECT NOW IT FEELS JUST LIKE A DREAM
BUT I KNOW ITS REALLY FRAGILE SO I'M WALKING ON THE BALANCE BEAM
CAREFULLY, CAUTIOUSLY
ITS TAKING EVERYTHING NOT TO JUST DIVE IN
I HAD ALMOST GIVEN UP
THIS COULD BE MY LAST CHANCE FOR LOVE
OUR TWO WORLDS COLLIDED IN A GENTILE STORM
ITS HARD TO HOLD BACK WHEN YOUR BODY IS SO SOFT AND WARM
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8. |
Harry And The Benjamins
01:45
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THEY'VE USED HIS IMAGE TO SELL ALL THEIR STUFF
JACK LINKS, YETI COOLERS, SASQUATCH PIZZA
HIS BLURRY PHOTOS POSTED ON THE INTERNET
HE DIDN'T SIGN A RELEASE NOW THEY'RE GONNA REGRET IT
BIGFOOT WANTS HIS MONEY BACK
SASQUATCH NEEDS TO CASH HIS CHECK
HOLLYWOOD'S BEEN CASHING IN AND HE WONDERS WHERE HIS LOOT IS
HE SAW CHEWBACCA IN STAR WARS NOW HE WANTS TO SUE GEORGE LUCAS
HE'S GOT A TEAM OF LAWYERS READY TO START THE LITIGATION
HE'S HAD ENOUGH OF ALL THIS BLATANT SASQUATCH EXPLOITATION
BIGFOOT WANTS HIS MONEY BACK
SASQUATCH NEEDS TO CASH HIS CHECK
GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY
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9. |
Boss
03:11
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READ A LITTLE AYN RAND
NOW I'M AN INTELLECTUAL
SAW A MOVIE ONCE
ABOUT THE FALLING PRICE OF OIL
CREATED A HASHTAG
SINCE I'M AN ACTIVIST
SOON I CUT THE CORD
THEY CALL ME NIHILIST
DON'T KNOW TOO MUCH
ABOUT MUCH OF ANYTHING
I HEAR SOCIALISM
COULD BE THE NEXT BIG THING
I'VE GOT A TRUST FUND
THAT'S JUST BETWEEN YOU AND I
DAD SAYS I CAN'T HAVE IT THOUGH
'TIL I TURN TWENTY FIVE
I'M JUST BIDING TIME
AT MY UNIVERSITY
NONE OF THE BITCHES HERE
WANT TO FUCK ME
MAYBE I'LL GET A GUN
SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE
IT'D BE A FUCKING BLAST
OPEN FIRE IN SCIENCE CLASS
LIKE IT MATTERS ANYWAY
AS THE ICE CAPS MELT AWAY
I'LL PROVE THEM WRONG SOMEDAY
I'LL BE A BOSS
I'LL BE A BOSS X4
I'VE GOT A TECH JOB
IF YOU COULD CALL IT THAT
UNTIL THE NEXT JOB
I'LL BE MEDIOCRE AT
I VOTE REPUBLICAN
UNLESS I'M VOTING DEMOCRAT
IT'S ALL A JOKE TO ME
DOING LINES OFF MY DEAD CD
I ROCK A MAN BUN
AND BIRKENSTOCKS
I THINK THE PIXIES SUCK
BUT DAVE MATHEWS ROCKS
I DRIVE A MERCEDES BENZ
ITS BIO DIESEL
HANGING OUT WITH TEENAGE GIRLS
LISTENING TO SCREECHING WEASEL
CLUELESS TO THE FACT
I'M NEARLY BRAIN DEAD
I KNOW JUST HOW TO LOOK AND ACT
TO SUCK AND GET AHEAD
THAT'S THE WAY IT GOES
IT'S ALL JUST WHO YOU KNOW
WHEN I COLLECT MY ESCROW
I'LL BE YOUR BOSS
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10. |
Scumbag Steve
02:48
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I WAKE UP AT 12:01 IN MY CLOTHES AND SNEAKERS AND MY KEYS ARE STABBING ME IN THE THIGH
I SAY TO MYSELF THAT TODAY'S THE DAY I'M FINALLY GONNA MOW THE GRASS AND GET THE POWER TURNED BACK ON
I PINCH A LOAF, EAT SOME CHIPS, AND CHECK OUT ESPN.COM ON MY BLACKBERRY STORM
I HEAD TO THE GARAGE ONLY TO FIND MY GAS CAN IS EMPTY AND MY LAWNMOWER IS GONE
I CLOSE MY EYES AND COUNT TO TEN
RUB YOUR NAME FOR LUCK
COULDN'T GET A KICK IN A DAMN STAMPEDE AGAIN
YOU DON'T GIVE A FUCK
I JUMP INTO MY 280ZX WITH HALF A PAYCHECK AND HEAD ON TOWARDS THE STRIP
I SEE VAGRANTS, PIMPS, HOOKERS, AND COPS ALL TRYING TO MAKE A BUCK
I END UP AT THAT BOWLING ALLEY WHERE WE FIRST MET AND LOSE IT ALL ON THE TOP GUN SLOT MACHINE
I CLOSE MY EYES AND COUNT TO TEN
RUB YOUR NAME FOR LUCK
YOU DIDN'T COME HOME LAST NIGHT AGAIN
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK
TEN POUNDS OF SHIT IN A FIVE POUND BAG
WHEN WILL I EVER LEARN
AS I COME AROUND THE CORNER I SEE THE LIGHTS ARE ON
I KNOW SHE'S THERE I HOPE SHE’S READY FOR SOME MAKE UP SEX
WHAT’S THIS? AN EVICTION NOTICE? DAMN
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11. |
Medulla
02:47
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HANGING OUT AT A TACO STAND
BOPPING TO THE MARIACHI BAND
SIPPIN' ON A COLD HORCHATA
I MET A GIRL NAMED MEDULLA OBLONGATA
ROSIE CHEEKS AND POUTY LIPS
I LIKED THE WAY SHE WIGGLED HER HIPS
I ASKED HER IF SHE'D BE MY GIRL
SHE SAID "DUH DUH I DON'T KNOW”
MEDULLA OBLONGATA
I THINK SHE KIND OF LIKES ME A LOTTA
NOT THE BRIGHTEST FLAME
BUT STILL PLENTY HOTTA
SHE LET ME TAKE HER TO A BASEBALL GAME
I ASKED HER HOW SHE GOT HER NAME
SHE SAID IT CAME FROM THE KIDS AT SCHOOL
CAUSE SHE WAS THE SMARTEST GIRL THEY KNEW
ONE PLUS ONE IS ELEVEN
THREE PLUS THREE IS THIRTY THREE
MEDULLA FELL STRAIGHT FROM HEAVEN
AND LANDED ON HER HEAD RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME
ONE NIGHT ON A MOONLIGHT DRIVE
I ASKED HER IF SHE'D BE MY BRIDE
SHE SAID ONLY IF I'D BE HER GROOM
IS SHE SINCERE? I CAN ONLY ASSUME
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12. |
Try
03:12
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WHY EVEN TRY?
YOU'LL NEVER BE AS COOL AS YOUR FRIENDS
YOU WANT TO CURL UP AND DIE
AS YOU HELP LOAD UP THE VAN AGAIN
YOU SING ALONG
THINKING “THAT WILL BE ME SOMEDAY”
YOU TRIED TO WRITE A SONG
IT WAS CLUNKY AND CLICHE
DEEP DOWN INSIDE
YOU KNOW IT COULD NEVER BE
YOU GET HOME FROM WORK
AND FLIP ON THE TV
NO EMAIL OR TEXT
YOUR PHONE NEVER RINGS
DOESN'T IT DRIVE YOU MAD SOMETIMES?
ALWAYS WAITING IN THE WINGS
NOT EVERY ASSHOLE HAS WHAT IT TAKES
IT TAKES A CERTAIN KIND OF DOUCHE
AND A FEW LUCKY BREAKS
AND YOU'RE NOT THAT KIND OF DOUCHE
YOU'RE JUST A LOVABLE LOSER
BEATING OFF TO RERUNS OF THE X FILES
WHILE YOUR BOYS PLAY LOLLAPALOOZA
IT'S NOT FOR LACK OF HEART
YOU CAN SHRED LIKE JIMMY PAGE
BUT YOU DID IT ON A STRAT GUITAR
WHEN WARLOCKS WERE THE RAGE
YOUR BASS PLAYER QUIT
YOUR DRUMMERS A FLAKE
YOU HOPE YOU HAVE ENOUGH STRENGTH TO CONVINCE YOURSELF YOU'RE NOT SOME GLORY SEEKING FAKE
DON'T BE SAD
DON'T YOU CRY
IT'S NOT ALL BAD
I HEAR RANCID NEEDS A MERCH GUY
NOT EVERY ASSHOLE HAS WHAT IT TAKES
IT TAKES A CERTAIN KIND OF DICK
AND A FEW LUCKY BREAKS
AND YOU'RE NOT THAT KIND OF DICK
YOU'RE JUST AN UNLUCKY BASTARD
MOPPING BLOOD AND PUKE OFF THE DANCE FLOOR
WHILE YOUR BOYS ARE BACKSTAGE GETTING PLASTERED
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